India is one of the nations which take nursing with pride and it is in her culture to a major extend. Most new Mom’s try nursing at least for first six months and this often goes to a year and more. Unless you are concerned about one’s physical appearance which I don’t have some statics or there is not enough milk, no one ever denies her kid the milk needed for its first growth.
Grihalakshmi and Controversy:
Based on some social media campaign, Grihalakshmi decided to support women nursing in public places, which is indeed a remarkable attempt. There are no issues with it, I also appreciate they had a model to get their campaign attract people attention. I have a problem in the way they took it forward.
- Model seems to be feeding the kid: Imagine a scenario if she is doing this without the knowledge of the parents? Isn’t that an offence? The baby believes her to be its mother and would have tried getting milk. I cannot stop myself saying that this is just an act of pervert.
- Nursing a kid in public and the effort is truly remarkable since doing that with the Indian attire is definitely a herculean effort and I am aware of this as I am the father of a 3.5-year-old. Issue comes when you label every man as perverts.
- What to hide and what not to hide is your choice but I would not accept the generic society guidance to be immoral. I would say the act of revealing your bodies private parts is unethical from the doer’s side. This is not because seeing a mother nursing her kid make any men aroused, it is because we will definitely make us feel uncomfortable.
Chaos with the picture:
When I saw the picture, for a second I did stare at the model’s breast. Then immediately I felt the act was immoral. After a while I was scanning the social media posts, I see that it was not my problem that I stared at her, even the learned and affluent had the same opinion. I thought to discuss this with an acquittance of mine, Dr Max who is a doctor in Psychology from United States about this behavior. I cannot say much about the doctor since I did not get the permission to quote him in this blog. I told him that the act of staring at the breast made me feel uncomfortable. I thought it was an immoral act.
Dr Max view on this controversy:
Then he started discussing about the word immoral to me. It is a human instinct to get attracted to the opposite sex. That is the law of the universe, our entire system is built on it. It is natural to throw the glance or get aroused when you see someone show their personal assets. Our biology is defined in that way and we doesn’t get these feelings to our own people because of the relation, ethics and culture we follow. We respect our elders, we respect women and we value their privacy but it is immoral to claim that you are staring at me if you wide open yourselves making others uncomfortable.
Even in developed nations which our country sets examples at, they cover their breast while nursing just because it could make another person uncomfortable. The person talking to her will have to look somewhere else or only to her eyes, if it is not the case. The society defined values and culture come into practice because it is better to not make others feel uncomfortable.
Sex and morality:
He also told me about having sex in public. Being couple, they have all the right to have sex anywhere they want. That happens in movies today but we don’t see it happening in the street in developed countries either since that is immoral. I remember that there was news about a Mail officer who declined to serve a Nudist Community because she was not comfortable with the community living standards. The United States Postal Service is supporting their employee’s decision because they cannot force her to deliver the letters in a community which follows practice against her ethics.
The conclusion of the chat:
Why do we rate a movie? The content in the movie may not suit kids since they might assume the act of having sex or obscenity as a real-world event. They might try doing the same or even consider doing the same and that is the reason there are set of ratings to let the parents know that the content is right for a child or not. Similarly, every society/culture have their set of standards which one expect to follow. This is mostly defined to stop us being uncomfortable. He said that it is normal for anyone to throw a glance to the revealed part of anyone’s sexually explicit displays, but it is then the act that defines if the person is well mannered or not.
What’s my take?
“Moral Policing” comes as a big hindrance to the accepted solutions because people proclaim themselves as protectors of culture/society. Kissing in public is not a taboo and this is more accepted than peeing in public but kissing explicitly to showcase one’s right in front of kids or any obscene act to show one’s right are the acts of condemn. Few things are better to be done in private or agreed diaspora than in public. I objected the infamous vulgarity, “ The Kissing Strike” just because that is what our kids watch. That is not good for them. If a couple decide to kiss to exchange or share their love is more pleasant than few bunch of morons’ act like animals to showcase their such acts for their pleasure is unacceptable. Similarly, I would say that what Grihalakshmi started was with right intention but executed it is totally in a wrong way and themed it more objectionable way. I would even be willing to take the matter for judicial intervention since this not less than an offense to involve a child (new born) to such acts.
I support the mothers who are nursing their kids and they deserve privacy. I will not tolerate someone staring at my wife who has already taken measures to not to make others uncomfortable. It is the mothers call to handle the situation better and less uncomfortable to others. Everything is not fashion or trend and assuming nudity as liberalizing is just moronic. Let us concentrate on what matters than creating controversies. Grihalakshmi should be aware that no one is against nursing or have question in their privacy, but we are against you objectify and commercializing such noble acts.